Hello everyone, I'm Gretel, and this is my page!

I'm a red miniature pinscher. I was born July 8, 1995 in the boonies near Orrick, MO. I weigh about 5 pounds and am spoiled rotten.

Things I like:

Pulling up the linoleum squares on the kitchen floor my dad just put down and eating them and watching dad chase me and say bad words.
Chewing on any exposed parts I can find on my shih-tzu brothers, Eli and Cuddles until they play with me.
Going shopping with mom in her purse.
Flattening my ears out til I look like a 747 and wagging my stump with glee when an overweight woman comes up to pet me.
Lying by a window, soakin up sun rays til I get so hot, smoke comes out of my ears.
Taunting my parents by not coming when they call me, and making them chase me (to keep them in shape!).

GRRRR! Things I don't like:

Big doggies who don't think I'm a doggie too
People who call me a Chihuahua
The cold! A friend of mom's made me a purple sweater with my name on the back which mom & dad make me put on in the winter cause I get the shivers! My first sweater was one of moms old socks she cut the toes out of and cut two holes in it for my front feet. It kept those hairs on my back from sticking straight up in the cold for a while, but I finally outgrew it.
Shots from the vet. Everytime I get vaccinated I get sick. The vet says they only have one size shot for all dogs, but it seems like they're giving me an awful lot for my size.
Vacuum sweepers! I know these are really robots from hell, and there's a monster inside them, sure as there's a prize in a Cracker Jack box!
Sharing things with my Shih-tzu brother Eli. Doesn't he know I'm an only child???

Favorite place:

Pet Care Superstore. I've applied for my own credit card there and have a matching purple and rhinestone collar and leash from there. They had to sell me the "cat" size because the dog ones were too big.

Scariest time of my life:

When mom dropped her estrogen pill on the floor and I ate it when I was about 5 months old. The vet said I'd probably go into heat early and look like Dolly Parton, but it didn't happen. Mom moved all her pills to the bathroom so it wouldn't happen again.

Update June 13, 1996:

Lots of new things are going on. Mom and Dad have bought me a new collar (still purple, but wider with LOTS MORE JEWELS!) and a ski jacket. It's shiny, with lots of bright colors and has a hood that zips out of the collar! Dad put it on me while I helped him by biting his fingers. He was laughing so hard I thought he'd never finish dressing me. They also bought me a denim jacket. I won't get to wear either of them too much til fall. I love summertime! There are the most tasty treats outside to eat. It's like an all you can eat buffet. Dad calls em "june bugs". Oh, yummy! Then I come in and give Mom a big kiss.

Update June 25, 1996:

I took second place in the smallest dog contest in downtown Overland Park, KS last weekend and won a big bag of dog food. They didn't have any bags of june bugs, so I settled for the dog food. (You never know when company might drop by).

Update November 24, 1996:

My website was selected by Dogmark Online Magazine Webpage in Japan as the best doggie website of the day

Update December 12, 1996:

My website was given the Halo Page Award by Lori's Angel Page.

Update July 1997:

I got REAL sick and quit eating. Not even any june bugs!! I went to the hospital and they put an IV in me and made me feel good again. The doc said I had a "pancreatitis attack", whatever that is. They sent me home with amoxicillin and tagamet. I got better real quick and bit a hole thru my dad's finger when he was trying to give me the medicine. He sure bled a lot! Human's DO taste just like chicken!

Update May 14, 1998: I got a historyectomy (spaded). Ouch! My parents were real scared that I'd have problems with the anesthetic, but I came thru it like a trooper! I'm glad that's over with. Those heats were really tough on me, and now I don't need to worry about some of those bad things, like cancer. I'm too little to have pups anyways, and I got lots better things to do than nurse a bunch of screaming babies, cause I'm a 90s woman!

Update July, 1998 Mom bought a papoose to carry me shopping in!!!

click here to see me in it

Update July 8, 2002 It's my 7th birthday today!! I've developed a taste for some new foods. My parents are amazed that I like them. They include:
Carrots
Broccoli
Watermelon
Lima beans

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See More Pictures of Gretel

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